The Mice-of-War

The Mice-of-War was a name given to a group of mice, who far removed from the timid behaviour of a normal mouse, were fiercely warlike and aggressive. The Mice-of-War existed for many thousands of years and have been involved in all wars, battles and skirmishes, many of which they started. The Mice-of-War originated in Britain but go wherever they need to go to find wars, they often do not fight on either side and establish a third side in the war, unless the war involves Britain in which case they always fight in Britain’s side. Their main goal is to expand the British Empire as well as continue fighting in whichever war they can. The number of wars they have been involved in are innumerable, but include the Hundred Years’ War, the Thirty Years’ War, the Seven Years’ War, the French Revolutionary Wars, the Napoleonic Wars, the Crimean War, the First World War and most notably, the Second World War.

A large portion of the Mice-of-War, including their leaders, General Robert and Admiral Henry are extremely racist against all non-white humans, sexist against women, homophobic and xenophobic, believing all those who are not English inferior, however they believe some nationalities are better than others, they also express a wish to go to war with most countries. They refer to Germans as “kraut”, “hun” or “bosh” and they refer to Italians “iteys” or “dagos”. The country the Mice-of-War is Germany as they believe that the year in 1946 (at the time of their deaths) and that Britain is still at war with Germany. On many occasions, the Mice-of-War have kidnapped innocent German tourists as well as other non-Germans they suspect to be Germans and subjected them to torture, such as having bananas and most infamously pineapples, including metal pineapples inserted into the victim’s anus. The Mice-of-War then interrogate the victims about “secret Nazi plans” and do not accept their victims pleas of innocence. The Mice-of-War also have killed many Germans as well as individuals of other nationalities. Their attacks against Germany often include aerial bombing or naval bombardment.

The Mice-of-War do not need weapons to kill and are skilled at killing using just their teeth, they do this by squeaking and lunging at the victims jugular vein which they sever, thereby killing the victim. The Mice-of-War, especially General Robert, have often attacked Adolf Hitler and his friends, this often results in injury or occasionally death for Adolf Hitler and his friends. The Mice-of-War continued to be an international menace, despite the best efforts of several world leaders. The Mice-of-War fought for John C. Star until they were convinced by Jarvis the Dodo and Professor Chicken Licken to support them instead. In February 2018, the Mice-of-War attempted to coup incumbent world leader, Peter the Pike, but they were unsuccessful and Peter the Pike had General Robert, Admiral Henry and their army of 200,000 Mice-of-War tortured to death. In March 2018, after the dodos left Earth, the Mice-of-War spotted an opportunity to take over the world and began the March 2018 Attempted World Invasion, during their attempted takeover, they killed King Julian, the lemur king of a small jungle kingdom. However this was a failure and Pinksheep beat the Mice-of-War and became world leader instead. In May 2018, incumbent world leader, Karl Marx appointed a chicken known as Brexit Chicken as devolved leader of the United Kingdom. Brexit Chicken resurrected General Robert who led the Mice-of-War to attack Karl Marx and to attempt to depose him, this however was unsuccessful and both General Robert and Brexit Chicken as well as many Mice-of-War were put to death. Later in May 2018, General Robert and the Mice-of-War May have supported Professor Chicken Licken, in July - August 2018, they supported Mr Peckles, Mr Nooty Noot and Mr Gobble Gobble.

Until around February 2019, the Mice-of-War stayed relative quiet until the First PinkDowlg Civil War broke out. This greatly exited the Mice-of-War and they soon joined in the fighting, they fought against both PinkDowlg and John C. Star and were very disappointed when the fighting ended. However they were relived when the Second PinkDowlg Civil War started not long after. At first the Mice-of-War supported John C. Star as he pledged allegiance to King George VI and Winston Churchill and promised that he was a mere military officer and would conquer the world of their behalf, however John C. Star did this in understanding that King George VI and Winston Churchill were dead and would stay dead and only pretended to pledge allegiance to them to gain the Mice-of-War’a support. When Geroge VI and Winston Churchill was resurrected who ordered John C. Star out of his chair, calling him a mere military officer and an inferior, John C. Star refused and insulted Winston Churchill. This caused Winston Churchill to shoot John C. Star, who was subsequently resurrected, this also caused the Mice-of-War to turn against John C. Star and fight against him, they also mostly abandoned their battles against PinkDowlg to concentrate their resources against John C. Star who was put under even more strain. The Mice-of-War declared their wish to Re-establish the British Empire with King George VI and Winston Churchill as King and Prime Minister. They saw some successes, at one point they likely killed John C. Star, however he was soon resurrected. They also experienced some losses, including perhaps their leaders being killed by Susan, Margaret, Maude and Mabel. They continued to fight against both sides but were defeated by PinkDowlg after he ate many donuts, grew several thousand miles tall and reached faster than life speeds. Almost all the Mice-of-War, including General Robert and Admiral Henry were killed.

On the 22nd August 2019, as PinkDowlg celebrated his victory by torturing to death all of his enemies including General Robert, Admiral Henry and Winston Churchill however he spared King George VI as he believed King George VI was not to blame for the events. Winston Churchill was burnt to death in a giant cigar, but General Robert and Admiral Henry were tortured to death in more conventional ways.

The remaining Mice-of-War collapsed into chaos and turned on each other, each believing the other group of Mice-of-War were German spies. The number of Mice-of-War Fluctuated between 120-900 as they got killed extremely often but almost instantaneously got resurrected by the other Mice-of-War. Around new year 2020 (The Mice-of-War beloved 2020 to be 1946) the Mice-of-War expressed the hope and expectation that Britain would defeat Germany by the end of the year. Around February-March 2020, Adolf Hitler ordered his chief scientist, Leonardo to turn off the resurrection machines used by the Mice-of-War, this caused them to stay dead and it was a matter of hours before the Mice-of-War had killed all other Mice-of-War. As of March 2020 all Mice-of-War are believed to be dead, this is believed to be true as they have not been seen since their resurrection machines were disconnected.